hello week 10

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So I realized this morning that the past 6 weeks have flown by. it didnt seem like it at the time but now it does. i have had the worst morning sickness, all i do is lay in bed, sleep and lay in bed some more. i am beyond ready for this first trimester to be over with!! other people say “dont rush it” “your gonna miss it” and blah blah blah just really piss me off. it’s not like im saying “come on baby momma wants her body back” nope.. thats not what im saying at all, what i am saying is that i NEED to be able to do my chores, clean my house, cook dinner, dishes, laundry, all of that stuff doesnt just stop because i cant seem to move out of the bed half the time without barfing. i just want my energy back, i dont want to have to take pills 3-4 times a day that make me so drowsy that i cant stay awake. i just want the good part of the pregnancy to start. thats all. not too much to ask and if im gonna be judged on that then people can kiss my ass bc they arent the ones dealing with it. and just for the record, this was not a planned pregnancy. i am happy about it .. very excited, i just am ready for the second trimester to start. the first is so over rated.
Anyways… so yeah… ive been misserable.. and on top of fighting the sickness we lost a very special cat last week. so heartbreaking!! its infuriating! the cat the vicious dogs attacked couldnt climb trees, he was too fat, i shouldve made him come in that morning before i left. guilt that i will carry for god knows how long. hormonal hurricane doesnt begin to describe how i am anymore..
dont get me wrong, i have had a few good days where i am productive, i feel normal and i can get out of the house and enjoy myself. but those days are rare. mostly i just enjoy the company of my loved ones in my bed 🙂
In the weeks to come, very soon… the sickness is supposed to start to ease off, im praying this happens sooner then later. ALSO… EVERYONE pray for me… i need this baby to be a girl… i need one girl in my house!! i have boys, they are awesome and i love having boys, but i desperately want a girl. i dont want to go through this again so i really would like this to be my last pregnancy… so i ask that everyone pray for me!!!

until next time…

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